


Smells Like Elves

by Emsiecat



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Bilbo is a Sweetheart, Both sassy, Consort Bilbo Baggins, Dwarves have heightened senses, Fluff, Hobbits have heightened senses, M/M, Schmoopy dumbs, Thorin is a Softie, bilbo loves elves, but not the same senses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-30 07:34:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6414673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emsiecat/pseuds/Emsiecat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr is an overflowing font on inspiration for ficlets it seems. So here, have another! From the conversation between linguisticparadox and linddzz:</p><p>“‘Hmmm! it smells like elves!’ thought Bilbo.”<br/>Wait. What.<br/>What exactly does an elf…smell like….</p><p>This raises so many questions!</p><p>-does bilbo sniff around for elves like some weird hobbity bloodhound?<br/>-do hobbits have extra sensitive senses of smell and do they use this to find mushrooms and truffles? (answer is obviously yes)<br/>-nevermind what do elves smell like how does bilbo KNOW what elves smell like<br/>-good thing he didn’t say this out loud. i can just imagine the looks the company would have given him if Bilbo sniffed the air and declared “it smells like elves!” in that cheerful hobbit way of his<br/>-hobbits are creepy</p><p>So in this fic Bilbo DOES say it aloud, and Thorin's been dwelling on it like a broody dork ever since. Cue the (happy!) end of the Quest and Thorin simply HAS to know!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Smells Like Elves

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lindzzz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lindzzz/gifts).



It wasn’t until the beast was slain, the armies disbanded, and Thorin properly healed and crowned that the dwarf had occasion to ask the question which had been burning like a brand in the back of his mind for months now.

It was an important question… to him at least, but not so important that he could have found an apt time to ask before now.

“There is something I have been meaning to ask you for quite some time, Master Burglar,” Thorin’s voice was indulgent, affectionate, and Bilbo hid a grin in the folds of the dwarf’s nightshirt as he decided to play along with whatever game Thorin was considering.

“Yes, Your Majesty?”

Thorin took his sweet time in asking, prolonging the moment by combing gentle fingers through Bilbo’s growing hair. The hobbit rolled his eyes but refused to play into Thorin’s hands by being impatient.

“What, precisely, does ‘elf’ smell like?”

“What?” Bilbo was flummoxed and just a little put -out. He had expected some sweet and silly query involving perhaps a delay to starting their day, not… well this!

“You said a long time ago that ‘it smells like elves’ I was curious to know what you meant.”

“I meant exactly that,” Bilbo huffed, a pout twisting his lips. So much for sweet and silly… well alright maybe it was silly but- “It smelled like elves.”

“I had no notion that elves smell of anything in particular… unless they’re wine soaked and utterly sozzled.”

Bilbo pinched Thorin’s waist in reprimand and the dwarf chuckled, nosing into Bilbo’s curls.

“Well, they do. You mean to tell me you _can’t_ smell them?”

Thorin hummed in response, pulling Bilbo closer. Shaking one’s head looked a little awkward when lying on one’s side in bed, but the dwarf king managed. “Unless one of them was covered in orc filth, no I cannot say I’ve ever noticed a particular smell to elves.” Thorin paused, realisation dawning like the slowly rising sun outside. “This is another hobbitish peculiarity, isn’t it?”

“Peculiarity?” Bilbo squawked, indignant.

“That you can smell things more acutely than my kin or I.”

“Hmm… well… perhaps that is so, I cannot say I’d ever thought on it before,” Bilbo did that thing, that adorable little expression whereby he scrunched and wriggled his nose in thought and Thorin felt his smile widen at the sight of it.

“So, I’ll ask again; what does elf smell like?”

Bilbo considered his beloved for a long while, trying to decide whether he was being teased or not, but eventually decided that Thorin’s curiosity was sincere and so decided to indulge him with an answer.

“Magic… I think,” Bilbo ignored the soft snort of incredulity and continued. “I- I can’t say for certain what ‘magic’ smells like but it’s… you know that smell, that sensation you get just before a terrific summer storm? The air is thick and charged and crackling with energy? It- elves smell a bit like that… there’s often flowers too, something fresh and clean like a well or spring or busily flowing stream… The elves from Mirkwood- apologies- _Greenwood_ had something like decaying wood to them-”

Here Thorin grinned as if Bilbo had given him a present and Bilbo scowled, reaching up to tweak his beloved’s nose.

“That has gone now of course, their scent is pleasant,” and here was Thorin’s turn to pout… daft fauntling! Bilbo pointedly ignored his expression, as if Bilbo had betrayed him in the worst way possible in complimenting the scent of the weed-eater’s. The silly old dwarf was only teasing of course. “Since the Greenwood is healing so too has the scent of those elves improved… they smell more of green and growing things than their kin in Rivendell… they are… wilder?”

“Interesting…”

“Hmm,” Bilbo thought that was the end of the conversation and nuzzled his face back into his pillow, determined to get another hour’s sleep if he were allowed, but naturally-

“What does dwarf smell like then?”

If Bilbo did not know his husband so well, he would have mistaken the tone for nonchalant, casual. However, Thorin’s voice was far too measured, too careful to be anything but fully concerned as to Bilbo’s answer in this.

Bilbo couldn’t resist, he smiled into the pillow and reached out blindly to tug lightly on one of Thorin’s braids. “For the most part you all smelled like unwashed goats during our journey-”

He could practically _feel_ Thorin’s offended scowl. Or maybe that was just the vengeful hands which darted out to tickle him.

Bilbo hooted with laughter, scrambling to hide beneath the quilt as if it might offer some respite from his husband’s ‘attack’. Well, really! You try to be truthful… an honest burglar and this was the thanks you get!?

“Unwashed goat, is it? Not nearly so pleasant as your darling elves I’d wager!” Thorin was laughing too, mercilessly poking and tickling at the hobbit as Bilbo tried to squirm out of reach without falling out of bed. True, he sounded happy enough, but Bilbo _could_ detect a hint of wounded pride in his tone.

“You take my words too seriously, dear heart,” Bilbo gasped once he had managed to adequately fend Thorin long enough to catch his breath. “We were all rather ripe on that little trip. Journeying halfway across Middle Earth with minimal supplies, clothes, and chances to bathe will do that to any creature, even my ‘darling’ elves.”

Thorin really did manage to look impressive even when apparently sulking, the great lump. “So your estimation of our scent has changed, I trust?”

“Oh, very much so,” the smile on Bilbo’s face held a hint of mischief.

“And is the scent of dwarf more pleasant to you now?”

“I cannot speak for all, I don’t tend to go around sniffing at every dwarf you know, but there’s one in particular who has a very enticing scent,” Bilbo’s grin had grown almost predatory and Thorin had to fight to bite back his laughter.

“And who might this dwarf be? Someone close to you, I trust.”

“Oh, very much so… both literally and figuratively at this moment,” Bilbo’s words were almost a purr and Thorin could feel a blush creeping up his neck.

“And-… what does he smell like?”

That seemed to be invitation enough, for Bilbo was on him in a moment, limbs tangling and bodies entwining as he buried his nose into the crook of Thorin’s neck and inhaled deeply, lips brushing Thorin’s skin in a soft caress. 

“Like home… love, adoration, a thousand different things which give me the deepest joy, _amrâlimê_.”

Thorin swallowed thickly, hands slipping around Bilbo’s waist to pull him closer still. “Even when he has been working the forge or spent a morning being thoroughly trounced by Dwalin in the training ring?”

Bilbo grinned against Thorin’s neck and gently nipped at him. The poor dear really _was_ concerned after all. “Especially then, actually. He has the most lovely scent of any creature in this wide world. Besides, darling, there is quite a difference to the scent of sweat brought about by a day’s honest labour and the scent of week old unwashed dwarf. _Your_ scent is my favourite thing, please stop fretting.”

Thorin grinned, the shy curve of his smile hidden against the crown of Bilbo’s head before he gently pulled him back only to swoop in and kiss him.

 

* * *

 

“So… what do I smell like to you?” Bilbo couldn’t help but ask a good hour later as they still lazed in bed (Balin would have their hides, this they both knew).

Thorin blinked, considered, shrugged… “tea and toast?”

“You - your sense of smell really _is_ lacking isn’t it?” Bilbo laughed and swatted at his husband. “Tea and toast!? I describe you as home and love and many poetic things and you choose _tea and toast_!”

“It is not our sense of smell which is our strongest sense, Bilbo. Our eyes however…” he smiled charmingly. “Shall I tell you how beautiful _your_ eyes are, how they sparkle with mirth or flash with anger; how their colours change and shift like the lights above a northern sky at night? Or shall I tell you how your curls shine like honey, how your throat bobs when you swallow because you’re embarrassed or nervous, just so…” a kiss to Bilbo’s cheek caused that very reaction. “Your hands dance when you speak and-”

And Bilbo cut him off by hauling him into another of many kisses.


End file.
